Categories
Islam

I want a divorce from my husband.

I want a divorce from my husband. Is that a good thing to do?

How do I go about it? Am I sinful for thinking this? Do I have to stay with him for 3 months? Do I give back my dowry (Mahr)?

Khul’a (الخلع) is the legal Islamic term for a woman requesting and getting a divorce from her husband. This is different than a divorce initiated by the husband, known as Talaq (الطلاق).

Abdullah ibn Abbas narrates that the wife of Thabit b. Qais got a divorce (Khul’a). So the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) commanded her to wait for one menstrual cycle before remarrying. This incident is reported authentically by many scholars including Tirmidhi.

Rabi bint Muawwiz (female companion) got a divorce (Khul’a) from her husband in the time of Uthman. Rabi’s uncle asked Uthman, “Can she leave her husband’s house immediately?”

Uthman replied, “Yes she must. There’s no inheritance between them (i.e. divorce is done). She must wait one menstrual period before remarrying to ensure that she isn’t pregnant.”

From these two incidents (along with the backing of major scholars of the companions like Uthman, Abdullah b. Umar and other later scholars such as Ishaq b. Rahawai, Imam Ahmad, ibn Taymiyyah, etc.) it’s clear that:

  1. A woman can request and get a divorce Islamically (Khul’a) as this was done by at least two female companions. There’s nothing wrong or sinful about it.
  2. The divorce is settled between the husband and the wife. So the wife asks for it and the husband agrees to it…and that’s it. There’s no “Islamic” paperwork. However, in the West, marriage and divorce should always be filed at city hall to ensure the correct legal status.|
  3. The divorce becomes final immediately, so the woman can leave the husband and move on. This is clear from Uthman’s verdict. This is especially important for women who have been abused. I’ve heard imams forcing abused women to stay with their husbands for 3 months to finalize the divorce!! That’s adding to the pain completely unnecessarily.
  4. The waiting period before remarrying is only one month for Khul’a. This is great as it allows a woman to quickly move on with her life, as she should.
  5. The financial terms of the Khul’a are open (if needed). As long as both agree to it, the divorce becomes final. There’s no requirement for the woman to give back her dowry (Mahr) as that is her right. If she chooses to and they agree, that’s acceptable.
  6. Is divorce a good thing? That is not a fiqh question. That totally depends on your circumstances.

Allah knows best.

Categories
Islam Quran

Getting Our Sins Forgiven in Ramadan

Ramadan is the month where Allah forgives sins and frees people from the fire of hell. But there is one condition to this forgiveness: avoiding al-kabaair. Give it a listen.

Categories
Islam

Khutbah – The Major Sins

What’s the clearest path to Jannah?

إِن تَجْتَنِبُوا كَبَائِرَ مَا تُنْهَوْنَ عَنْهُ نُكَفِّرْ عَنكُمْ سَيِّئَاتِكُمْ وَنُدْخِلْكُم مُّدْخَلًا كَرِيمًا

“If you avoid the major sins which you are forbidden, We will remove from you your lesser sins and admit you to a noble entrance [into Paradise].” [4:31]

A short discussion on the meaning of this ayah:

Click here to download

Categories
Islam

Be Good, Even to Those Who Aren’t Good to You

أَدِّ الأَمَانَةَ إِلَى مَنِ ائْتَمَنَكَ ، وَلا تَخُنْ مَنْ خَانَكَ

“Fulfill your promise towards the one who entrusted you, but don’t betray the one who betrayed you.” – Prophet ‪#‎Muhammad‬

Some brief thoughts on this hadith:

– Hadith is narrated by Abu Huraira, reported in AlJami, authenticated by Sh Al-Albani
– Good treatment extends to all, especially if they are good to you
– True mark of character is to extend good treatment towards the one who is hostile towards you
– Fulfillment of promises is a hallmark of the believer, whereas betrayal is the hallmark of the hypocrite

Categories
Adab Advice Allah Islam Jannah Life Paradise Quran Tazkiyyah

The Value of Sabr

The translations for the Ayaat are taken primarily from M. A. S. ABDEL HALEEM’s translation with some changes and noted exceptions.

Immeasurable Payment

Zumar_10
Zumar:10

Those who persevere patiently will be given their reward in full without measure.

Key to Victory/Success in Dunya

Sajdah_24
Sajdah:24

When they [the children of Israel] became steadfast and believed firmly in Our messages, We raised leaders among them, guiding them according to Our command.

Araaf_137
Araaf:137

We made those who had been oppressed succeed to both the east and the west of the land that We had blessed. Your Lord’s good promise to the Children of Israel was fulfilled, because of their patience, and We destroyed what Pharaoh and his people were making and what they were building.

Aali_Imraan_120
Aali_Imraan:120

They grieve at any good that befalls you [believers] and rejoice at your misfortunes. But if you are steadfast and conscious of God, their scheming will not harm you in the least: God encircles everything they do.

Key Reason for the Jazaa and Rewards of Jannah

Yusuf_90
Yusuf:90

Surely whoever is pious and (endures) patiently, then surely Allah does not waste the reward of the fair-doers [Dr.Ghali]

Muminoon_111
Muminoon:111

Today I have rewarded them for their patience: it is they who will succeed.

Furqan_75
Furqan:75

These servants will be rewarded with the highest place in Paradise for their steadfastness.

Qasas_54
Qasas:54

They will be given their rewards twice over because they are steadfast, repel evil with good, and give to others out of what We have provided for them.

Insan_12
Insan:12

and we reward them, for their steadfastness, with a Garden and silken robes.

The Reason for Peace/Safety and Congratulations from the Malaaikah

Rad_19-24
Rad:19-24

Can someone who knows that the revelation from your Lord is the Truth be equal to someone who is blind? Only those with understanding will take it to heart;  those who fulfill the agreements they make in God’s name and do not break their pledges; who join together what God commands to be joined; who are in awe of their Lord and fear the harshness of the Reckoning; who remain steadfast through their desire for the face of their Lord; who keep up the prayer; who give secretly and openly from what We have provided for them; who repel evil with good. These will have the reward of the [true] home: they will enter perpetual Gardens, along with their righteous ancestors, spouses, and descendants; the angels will go in to them from every gate,  ‘Peace be with you, because you have remained steadfast. What an excellent reward is this home of yours!’

A Small Price to Pay

From Ibn Rajab (Fadl ‘Ilm al-Salaf ‘Alaa al-Khalaf):

It is necessary that the believer have patience for a short while such that through it he will attain everlasting bliss. If he despairs and becomes impatient, he is as ibn al-Mubaarak said,

Ibn_Mubarakk_Quote
Whoever is patient, then how little is he patient for. And whoever is impatient, then how little does he enjoy himself.”

Al-Imaam ash-Shaafi’ee used to recite the following lines of poetry,

Imam_Shafie_Poetry
O my soul! It is nothing but a few days of patience;
It’s duration is like muddled/jumbled dreams.
O my soul! Pass through the world quickly;
And leave it alone, for the (true) life is certainly ahead of me.

Allah’s Common Surah Ending Command

Room_60
Room:60

so be patient, for God’s promise is true: do not let those with no firm beliefs discourage you.

Ahqaf_35
Ahqaf:35

Be steadfast [Muhammad], like those messengers of firm resolve. Do not seek to hasten the punishment for the disbelievers: on the Day they see what they had been warned about, it will seem to them that they lingered no more than a single hour of a single day [in this life]. This is a warning. Shall any be destroyed except the defiant?

Aali_Imraan_200
Aali_Imraan:200

You who believe, be steadfast, more steadfast than others; be ready; always be mindful of God, so that you may prosper.

Categories
Islam

Reflections for a Master’s Student at MEDIU

Advice by Abu Ibrahim, a master’s student at MEDIU. The original comment can be found here.

Having completed my first term at MEDIU on the master’s program I thought I would share some information for the benefit of prospective master’s students. The information provided on the university website unfortunately does not give a clear picture as to what the student should expect.

Firstly, the student has to choose either full-time or part-time mode of study. The full-time option involves enrollment on 4 or 5 units, whilst the part-time option means registering on 2 or 3 units. Each unit comprises a 5,000 word research paper, two short assignments (typically one or two pages in length) and the mid-term and final exams. In theory it is possible to complete the program within two years; however the constraining factor for most students will be the research paper which takes considerable time and effort to research and write. There are also four live lectures the student must attend to be eligible to enter the exams. The lectures essentially involve the instructor summarizing /reading verbatim one or more lessons and do not really have much impact on exam performance and attendance is more just an administrative requirement.

The master’s program differs from the bachelors program in a number of respects; there are no power-point style summaries of the course texts meaning that the onus is on the student to produce his own concise summary for revision purposes (with the exception of Manhjul Bahth). Each text consists of about 500 pages, so high level study skills are needed to sort the wheat from the chaff. Also another key difference is that both the mid-term and final exam includes written questions, alongside the usual multiple choice questions, which account for around 40% of the score. To score at the highest levels in the examinations a very detailed study of the text is needed (as some of the questions are looking for obscure detail), but for those wishing to gain the qualification with a good result, a solid, general understanding of each and every chapter (from my experience at least) should suffice.

My advice to prospective master’s students is to start the research papers as early in the term as possible, once the selected title(s) have been posted, to avoid unnecessary stress later on down the line. It is also advisable to use the period before term begins to start reading and summarizing the course texts; the texts are freely available on the university’s website. I believe that with a strategic approach it is possible to complete the masters in a short period of time with a good result inshallah.

Categories
Islam

Because You’ve Been Given More

A reminder that I gave to some graduating students

Categories
Islam

The MAPT (MEDIU Arabic Placement Test)

Bismillah.

I wrote a post about MEDIU a few years ago describing my experiences as a student there. One of the things that I didn’t experience was the MAPT (MEDIU Arabic Placement Test) since I had a diploma in Arabic that allowed me to bypass the test.

A few people who have taken the MAPT commented on the original post regarding the test. I’m singling out some of those comments in this post, hopefully it will help any potential students who might have to take the MAPT.

Aquib

assalaamu alaikum,

i have seen some questions asked about mapt. At some point i also wanted to know but did not get any information. Inshallah for general benefit i would like to state few things

This test will test you on grammar, listening comprehension, reading comprehension and vocabulary

If you are not prepared for the test, then these are the things that inshallah can help you attain sufficient knowledge needed to pass the test

1) Read “Aajroomiyah” in arabic and be comfortable with the text. In case you have read any matn advanced than this then inshallah you are good

2) try to listen and understand these aajroomiyah lectures as much as possible.

3) I benefitted a lot from this short booklet

http://www.iqra.org/ProductDesc.aspx?code=7297&type=0&eq=&key=it&desc=LearnHowtoSpeakArabic(PocketSize)

same book on amazon http://www.amazon.com/Learn-How-To-Speak-Arabic/dp/9953682100

Inshallah if you can gage ur knowledge based on this then inshallah you should not hesitate taking the test to complete the bachelors requirement (score of 70). I believe the duration of test was if i remember correctly was 2:30. I finished it in 2 hrs

I am in US, my test was conducted by a very nice polite person via skype. She conversed with me in English

and all thanks belong to Allah-SWT

Um Ayesa

I have sat the MAPT two months ago. It is a multiple choice online exam and can easily be achieved within the 2.5 hours allocated. It does not test speaking, nor was there any interaction on Skype as previously mentioned by Brother AAquib (in my case anyway). I would say that if someone has reached the level of Aajrumiyah in Nahw then it should be pretty straightforward, although there are some questions on Sarf and Balagah which threw me a bit! Also all round experience in reading texts is important and just knowledge of Arabic grammar will not get you through it. In summary you have to know Arabic to pass it however the level required is not beyond the reach of the serious student. MEDIU is a great product and all serious students of knowledge should try to take benefit from it as there are few resources like it on the internet. My advice is to start learning Arabic early and then when you’re ready go for the MAPT.

Categories
Islam

Guidance and Mercy for the Doers of Good

Categories
Islam

Recommendation on What to do During Laylatul Qadr

Image

Bismillah.

0) Isha and Fajr prayer in congregation (jama’ah). 

I put this as number 0 because if nothing else, this is the one thing a person HAS to do: pray Isha and Fajr in congregation.

The Prophet said, “The one who performs Isha’ prayer in congregation, is as if he has performed Salat for half of the night. And one who performs the Fajr prayer in congregation, is as if he has performed Salat the whole night.” [Reported by Muslim]

This is the baseline. Everything else after doing this is a bonus insha Allah.

1) Lots of dua.
Aisha [RA], when asking the Prophet about Laylatul Qadar, said, “What dua should I make if I were to find Laylatul Qadr?”. Her question tells us that in her mind, her task was clear: make lots of dua. So she particularly asked for which dua to make to get the maximum benefit out of this night.
Recommendation: get a book like the Fortress of the Muslim or ibn Taymiyyah’s Good Words then try to read as many (or all) of these duas. It is so spiritually uplifting.
2) Night prayers.
Try attending night prayers (qiyamul layl) somewhere. If you can do it yourself, that’s great as well. You can read from the Quran while praying (either by yourself or behind an Imam). You can even read from an app on a mobile device. Just put the device in airplane mode 🙂
3) Charity.
If a person can catch Laylatul Qadr and give charity on that night, that would have more goodness than a 1000 months of charity. Imagine that!
A pro tip: give $20 in charity every night, this way you’re sure to have given charity on Laylatul Qadr.
4) Qur’an.
Read as much Qur’an as possible. Try to memorize a few ayaat to gain a tangible benefit (perhaps first 10 or last 10 of Surah Kahf). If you don’t understand what you’re reading, then mix in some tafsir. But don’t spend the entire night listening to tafsir, keep a fair balance insha Allah.
The key is to mix to all these deeds. Start off the night with Isha in congregation and some charity. Proceed to read some Qur’an. Once warmed up, try to memorize a few ayaat. Then take a break with listening to a tafsir. Make dua afterwards and start night prayers. End the night with lots of dua, a nice healthy suhoor (or sehri) and Fajr in congregation.
May Allah make us extract the maximum benefit during this night, ameen.
WAllahu alam.